Chapter 17 Patient

Patience is a desirable quality but in our culture of instant gratification it's a rare one. Don't get me wrong, it's great that we have twenty-four-hour shopping, microwave ovens, immediate access to information and entertainment on demand. But having access to what we want, when we want is weakening one of our greatest attributes-the ability to wait.

Research has shown that when children were given a choice of having one marshmallow now or two after completing a task, the children who were able to wait were more successful later in life. Having the ability to resist impulses matters. We may be born with different levels of patience. But we can all make improvements. It's like any other skill; it can be developed with practice.

It's not easy. Even the best of us have to resist the need for speedy gratification. We speed up to beat the traffic lights. We speed up to get to the shortest queue. And even when we can't move faster, we hurry in the mind. It's as if we are on a drug. We get addicted to speed. But for a better and more fulfilling life we need to break the addiction. We need to fight against the quick-hit mentality.

Understand: if patience is a virtue, get-on-demand is a vice. So don't be seduced by the cash-and-carry rush-and-hurry lifestyle. We're fortunate to have most of what we want on demand. But don't let that weaken your ability to delay gratification. If you're lacking patience begin to build it with small things. Waiting in a queue on the phone, for example, is a good training ground. When you're able to wait without being annoyed about or anxious with the small things, move on to the big.

And there's more. You see, the desire to get things done quickly often means they don't get done properly. So if you want great results, be patient. Even learning to be patient takes patience. You can't speed up the process. If you do, the product will not be the same. It'll be of a lesser quality. Speeding up personal development is like cracking an egg before it's ready to hatch. And then wondering why you didn't get a chick.

Patience is your willingness to let life move forward at its own pace.


Keep this in mind: patience is your willingness to let life move forward at its own pace. There's no need to rush, push or hurry. Plant the seeds and let the organic process unfold. In other words, if you put in the effort you will see the fruits. They night not come when you want, but they will come when you're ready. And remember: the deeper the waiting, the sooner they'll come.